OPERATION: Pull-Out!

A bitter harvest ... my day in them woods retrievin' my game-cams.

    Howdy!  Hope all is well with all of y'all, and my blog is servin' some purpose other than releasin' the noise in my head.  Some of y’all probably already know this, but I ain’t big on keepin’ up with Facebook; that’s why I decided to create this blog … which I feel is comparable to scrapbookin’ for Rednecks.  If y’all wanna know what I’ve been doin’ as far as my amateur field research goes, it’d be right here.  Again … if my journalistic “style” (or lack thereof) offends anyone, please feel free to move on and God bless!  For those of you that’ve hung-on … I told y’all that I’d continue to post about sloughstalkin’ as well as some of my “misadventures” in Uncertain, Texas.  This is definitely one of ‘em …

 

     I’m one of them folks that try to follow every letter of the law.  I keep all licenses current and make a concerted effort to follow all of the rules, especially in the outdoors.  My wife might tell y’all differently ‘cause she’s always sayin’ that I never listen, but we won’t get into that here.  I do, too listen … ‘cause I took (and passed) the Texas Parks & Wildlife (TP&W) Hunter Education Course this summer.  Even though I was technically exempt (age-wise) I mainly took it to share the learnin’ experience with my son, who passed as well.  And speakin’ of learnin’ experiences, here’s somethin’ I really shoulda done-learnt a long time ago; my dad always said that no matter what you do, somebody somewhere is goin’ to know about it, period.  Read along and you’ll see how this fact will come ‘round full circle at the end of this blog entry …

 

     As previously stated in Our Encounter … soon after gettin’ a taste of what may have been an undocumented species of animal at Caddo Lake, I became abso-friggin’-lutely obsessed with findin’ out exactly what it was that my son and I had come across.  Since Caddo Lake is a 275-mile drive one-way from our home, weekend trips to the woods weren’t likely to happen that often … so I decided to set-out some game-cams.   I researched different brands of cameras and figured-out exactly what I needed, as well as what I could realistically afford.  Reconyx were out of the question ‘cause at the time, I was tighter than a skeeter’s ass in a nose-dive ... so, I settled on the Moultrie Game Spy I-35 Infra-Reds.  I actually followed the instructions and tested them for a month or so in the back of our property. After I was comfortable gettin' some shots of local wildlife (both day & night) I figured I'd better be able to secure my investment before leavin' 'em unattended in an East Texas swamp.

     Next, I ended-up purchasin’ the Moultrie metal, lockable security boxes for each of the cams.  Now, my wife’ll be the first to tell y’all that most store-bought gear just ain’t good enough for me.  I’m one of them creative-types … so I spent some time modifyin’ each of them boxes to suit my specific needs.  Just about everything I own has to be camouflaged … that’s a given; but first, I added some handles to make ‘em easier to carry in and out of them woods.  Then, I drilled a buncha-dang holes and inserted deck-screws with lock-washers from the inside-out of the covers of each box.  Why in the Hell, you may ask, would someone do that?  Well, I got that particular idea from watchin’ the “Sasquatch Attack” episode of MonsterQuest.  I figured doin’ this would serve two purposes: one, I may get lucky enough to collect some DNA evidence if my target quarry got overly curious with my cams; and two, to teach any other critter that might decide to mess with my cams that no means pain.  Sad to say, some folks like to take things that don’t belong to them, and I didn’t want my hard-earned cash settin’ in some pawn shop in Marshall or Shreveport.

   Accordin’ to the instructions supplied with each security box, you were s’posed to be able to strap the cams inside the boxes and to a tree.  That just wasn’t happennin’ … ‘cause I found issues with usin’ straps; the cams didn’t line-up properly inside the box, and they could be moved or misaligned easily.  The biggest issue I had was that straps could be gnawed or cut through.  The other option in the instructions was to use the bolts supplied and bolt the inside of the security box to a tree prior to lockin’ the cover over the box.  Again, store-bought gear ain’t good enough, so I bought stronger stainless-steel lag-bolts & fender washers that wouldn’t rust.  Y’all know how damp it gets in them woods, so stainless was my choice.  After gettin’ my cams set-up out in the field in early 2010, I started to get some really cool pics & video; but, sad to say, the only bipeds I caught on film were hunters.  I got pics of deer, hogs, coyotes, foxes, mink, coons, dillers and a squirrel that stuck his mug in the lens; but, those weren’t the Caddo critters I was tryin’ to film ...

 

     Durin’ the beginning of our drought in 2011, my buddy from Uncertain called and told me of some possible big-cat tracks he found behind his property in the Caddo Wildlife Management Area (WMA).  I had just purchased a new, smaller Moultrie Game Spy M-80 Infra-Red Game/Plot Camera and thought the perfect to place to deploy it would be in that immediate area.  I quickly purchased and customized a smaller Moultrie security box and planned a late-summer trip to Uncertain.  After scoutin’ the area one afternoon, we found (and casted) some pretty impressive big cat-tracks.  I had found an area to one side of this dried-up pond where several trails converged, and there was some scat and even the dried, partially devoured carcasses of fish.  Hmmm, here, kitty-kitty!

     I returned alone the next mornin’ to deploy my cam, but little did I know that the possibility of confrontin’ a big cat would be the least of my problems.  When I got back home, I located a wildlife biologist who worked in the area where I had cast the tracks.  We spoke on the phone and corresponded via e-mail.  Even though she thought that the track that I had casted was canine, I told her that I had set up a game-cam to catch the culprit.  When she inquired further about the camera and found-out that I had bolted the security box to the base of a tree in the WMA … she told me that I needed to call this person from TP&W who managed that WMA to find out the rules concernin’ have somethin’ bolted to a tree in the refuge.  Ruh, roh … Raggy!

 

     Obviously, I’d been a bad dog; not only did I bolt that particular game-cam … but I had four more set-out around Caddo as well!  Ignorance of the law is no excuse, so I figured that if I wanted to continue my amateur field research, I’d better fess-up & make it right.  I called TP&W and spoke with the person in charge of that WMA … and told her who I was and what I had done.  As expected, she told me that boltin’ or attachin’ things to trees out there was a no-no, and that if she found anything out there … she would remove it.  I told her that I was 275-miles away, and could not just come up there right away and remove my trail-cams.  I assured her that I would not put any more trail-cams out there, and when I took them down, I would patch the holes in the trees and figure-out another way to secure my cams.

     She asked me why I had the trail-cams out there in the first place, so I proceeded to tell her what had happened to my son and I in June of 2009.  Zoiks!  After droppin’ that bomb ... I could tell that the entire tone of our conversation pretty-much well changed. Hell, I never even used the word “Bigfoot”; even though she remained polite … you’d have thought I had just farted over the phone or somethin’!  I tried to let her know that I wasn’t part of the tin-foil hat crowd, that we had legitimately seen somethin’ out there and just wanted to know what the Hell it was or wanted to possibly catch it on film.  Awkward … and that conversation was almost two years ago.
 

 

     In the spring of this year, I headed  to Caddo to do my routine camera maintenance.  I had arranged to meet the folks from Squatch Unlimited, who ended-up takin’ me on a film-shoot for the upcoming movie, Skookum: The Hunt for Bigfoot.  Jeff Meldrum (who I had met at a TBRC Conference in 2010) was there, and we ended up talkin’ for quite some time between takes.  By the way … the low was 38° that night, so I think the film-crew and the actors earned their keep!  The next mornin’ … I took the SU gang into the area of our encounter.  The deal was, I was goin’ out there to do my camera maintenance anyways, they could tag-along and afterwards I’d take them on a lake tour.

     Sometimes … sh¡t just happens; a fallen tree had blocked our way through the channel, and them folks really weren’t dressed to go wadin’ through the goo around Smith’s Slough.  Tryin’ to find my cameras was a friggin’ joke; my GPS kept searchin’ for satellites and shuttin’ down.  So then we followed my trail-tape as far as we could until it disappeared into the flooded forest.  After a long hike back to the boat, I tooled them around the slough so they could film & take pictures.  As I was bringin’ ‘em back to the State Park on Big Cypress, an over-zealous wake-boardin’ boat did what wakeboardin’ boats do best … it waked the Hell out of us!  Two of the SU crew got soaked, and I felt like I’d pretty-much well failed as a swamp tour guide.  Embarrassed, I drank about it that evenin’ … and then it was all good.
 

 

     My wife can tell y’all that sometimes I can be a persistent little pecker; so the next day, I loaded my kayak onto my boat and headed for Smith’s Slough.  After chainin’ my bass-boat to a cypress, I launched, lugged, tugged, drug (over that fallen tree) re-launched & paddled through a butt-load of giant salvinia to find and and service the first pair of my game-cams.  The second pair were fairly easy to get to off of Big Cypess, but when I got to the WMA, I couldn’t find the fifth cam.  I checked my GPS coordinates and walked around for about 20-minutes before I found the tree with two holes in the base where my cam had previously been mounted.  I thought, Holy sh¡t … somebody ripped me off!  I was beyond p¡ssed, especially after the luck I had tryin’ to show the SU gang around.  That particular cam ran about $250.00 includin’ my custom security box, hardware, the 32-GB SD card and batteries.  And that particular cam had produced the most wildlife on it to date!  Now I’d never know whether I had captured any “bad-old puddy-cat” action or not.  I drank about it that evenin’ … but I was still madder than woodpecker with a creosote buzz.  I packed my gear the next mornin’, said bye to my friends and drove home, tail-tucked!

 

     That evenin’ … I went through the SD cards on my other 4 cams.  On one of ‘em I noticed a video of a bunch of deer haulin’ ass; the very next frame showed some gun-hunters walkin’ up to my cam, and then … the very next video shows three of the four “said hunters” tryin’ to remove my box from the tree!  The last culprit was a big-ole corn-fed boy who took ahold of my cam’s handle and yanked.  Hmmm, no wonder the dang handle was bent when I serviced it!  Now, the most amazin’ part of this video was that the time/date-stamp clearly shows that this incident took place in October … which is bow season here in Texas.  Hmmm, these guys weren’t carryin’ bows, so unless they was hog huntin’ … I wonder what they was doin’ out there in them woods?  The next time my buddy from Uncertain came to visit … I showed him that video.  He said he knew exactly who one of the guys was, and said he’d have a word with him.  Later, I posted an article on the SU site and mentioned my spring-trip fiasco and included a photo showin’ these hunters walkin’ up to the cams.  Remember what I said earlier, no matter what you do … somebody is goin’ to know about it.

 

     Hmmm, I guess that goes for me as well … ‘cause a couple weeks back, things come ‘round full circle.  In conversation with my buddy from Uncertain, he said, “Well … I got some good news, and some bad news about your missin’ camera.  The good news is, I found out where it is; the bad news is … it’s in the game warden’s office and she wants you to call her.  She said it took her a couple of trips and 2½ hours to get your camera off that tree!”  Hmmm … looks like I was fixin’ to cough-up a fine.  Now, it had been almost two years since my conversation with this person, so I spent about three or four beers lookin’ through old e-mails tryin’ to remember what her name was, and how I was even goin’ to get ahold of her.  Well, after some diggin’ ‘round on that-there internet … I found a name and a number.  When I called her and told her who I was … she’d already knew what I’d done.  And, she’d obviously read my articles on the SU site … which was how she knew who my buddy was.  Holy sh¡t … I’d done been cyber-stalked!  Seriously though, she was very cordial & polite, but to the point.  She said that I could have my camera back and not get a fine (this time) as long as I could prove to her that I’d taken the other four game-cams out of them woods and patched the holes in them trees.

 

     A little quick plannin’ forced me to initiate OPERATION: Pull-Out!  I now had to drop everything and go get my cams outta them woods and quick!  I’d hoped there’d be a happy-endin’ to this, but even though I wasn’t goin’ to be fined … it would still cost me about $120 in gas alone just to get up there & back.  I immediately told my wife what was up and she said to just take-off and go get ‘em.  Wow … that part was easy!  Thank God I have an understandin’ wife that now semi-tolerates my obsession with whatever my son and I saw out at Caddo Lake.  At first, I was spendin’ so much time out there that my wife hinted that maybe I had some Cajun-honey for a “fishin’ buddy” that I might’ve been shackin’-up with!  Really?  I was offended by her sarcasm at first, ‘cause after 20+ years of marriage … she ought to know that I don’t park my truck in any strange garages.  So, to get her goat … I done come-up with the bumper-sticker that I now sport on my truck.  I’ve gotten lots of compliments on that sticker; but, there is a true story behind my inspiration to create it …

 

     Late one Saturday night, I had gone to this little waterin’ hole they got out towards Cypress Village called The Lighthouse.  The place was actually kind of fun, and was packed full with the locals.  I had me a couple of beers, bought a couple of bags of ice and had walked outside when I seen somethin’ in the parkin’ lot.  Bathed in moonlight, I could see this tall, dark-haired woman smilin’ at me all glassy-eyed with smeered red lips and smoke slowly emittin’ from her nostrils.  As she staggered my way, I suddenly had this Travis Tritt tune goin’ off in my head.  Suspectin’ what animalistic intentions this inebriated beast may have had, I figured it would be in my best interest to get to the truck quickly and pull-out!  Y’all may think I’m just funnin’ ya, but I seen her … and I was scared!

 

 

     Getting’ back to the subject at hand, and since I have (almost) always followed every letter of the law, I completed OPERATION: Pull-Out!  After spendin’ a gruelin’ hot day in them woods … I extracted all four game-cams and patched the holes in those trees.  That game warden was nice enough to meet me on her own time, and I showed her the pictures of me takin’ my other four cams down and patchin’ them trees … ‘cause I’m a man of my word!  The moral of this story is, ignorance of the law is no excuse … and I’d better figure-out another way to secure my cams out in them woods without boltin’ ‘em to a tree.  Y’all need to make sure to have the proper permits and know all the rules before you go traipsin’ around a Wildlife Management Area or a National Forest.  Them rules are created and enforced to protect our natural resources.  Remember that …

 

     In closing, this whole situation did open my eyes, and I guess I need to be more careful about what I post on that-there internet.  But it also leaves me to ask one burnin’ question:  Why would a game warden (who probably wouldn’t publicly acknowledge even the slightest possibility of the existence of somethin’ like what my son and I saw out there in them woods) be lookin’ at “Bigfoot” sites?  Hmmm … interestin’ … think about it.  And, y’all come back now, you hear?